Keith waltzed into the house like he\u2019d just won a game show. Keys tossed into the bowl, shoes kicked off, smugness radiating from every pore.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cYou know what?\u201d he said casually, as though I hadn\u2019t just spent the last hour pacing the hallway with our red-faced, screaming 12-week-old. \u201cMom and Dad are going to a resort. They invited me. I\u2019m heading there next week.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I blinked. I hadn\u2019t slept properly in days. My breakfast had been the edge of a granola bar, and I was sipping the last of a lukewarm coffee that had been reheated three times. My body sagged under Lily\u2019s weight, still crying in my arms. And yet, here he was\u2014barely glancing at me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He gave a shrug. \u201cI need a vacation.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
There it was. The pause. The moment when my blood boiled, but I wasn\u2019t sure yet if I was going to scream or smile.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAnd me?\u201d I asked, my voice tight and barely audible.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He looked at me with that dismissive glint in his eye\u2014the one that always made my jaw tighten. \u201cYou don\u2019t work, baby. You\u2019re on maternity leave. You don\u2019t go into an office every day.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I blinked again. But this time, it was the kind of blink that comes right before a storm breaks loose.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cYou mean caring for a newborn all day isn\u2019t work?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Keith laughed. Not a nervous laugh. A full, belly-deep chuckle. \u201cCome on, I mean\u2026 it\u2019s not the same. You nap when the baby naps, right? It\u2019s like an extended vacation. And I\u2019m the one bringing in the money right now, so\u2026 I deserve this.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I stared at him for a long second. Then I smiled.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Not because anything was funny.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Because I was seconds away from hurling a bottle at his head.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But instead, I took a breath, counted to three, and offered the kind of smile only a furious wife can master\u2014sweet, serene, and quietly terrifying.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cOf course, my love,\u201d I said smoothly. \u201cYou\u2019re the breadwinner. Go. Enjoy yourself.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He grinned, kissed me on the cheek, and went off to pack as if he\u2019d just secured the Husband of the Year award.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Oh, Keith. You poor, clueless man.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The day he left, I kissed him goodbye on the porch, diaper bag in one hand and Lily on my hip. And the moment his car disappeared down the road, the real work began.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
First stop: the fridge. I emptied it. Every. Single. Thing. After all, groceries didn\u2019t just appear from nowhere like he seemed to believe.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Next: laundry. I collected every piece of dirty clothing he had, dumped it in a giant mountain by the washer, and left it there.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Then I logged into our joint account and canceled every automatic bill payment I could\u2014streaming services, internet, electricity. All of it. Poof.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
After that, I packed up Lily\u2019s entire nursery\u2014crib, changing table, diapers, wipes, onesies, bottles\u2014and loaded them into the car.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Finally, I left a note on the kitchen counter:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\n\u201cLily and I are on vacation too. Don\u2019t wait up.\u201d<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n
Phone off. Engine on. Off to my mom\u2019s house we went.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Two days of silence. Two glorious, uninterrupted, spa-robe-wearing days.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Then I turned my phone back on.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
His texts came flooding in almost immediately:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWhere ARE you, Sharon?? Are you serious about this vacation thing??\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Keith waltzed into the house like he\u2019d just won a game show. Keys tossed into the bowl, shoes kicked off, smugness radiating from every pore. \u201cYou know… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1904,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5233","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-blog"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/goodarticles.info\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5233","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/goodarticles.info\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/goodarticles.info\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goodarticles.info\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goodarticles.info\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=5233"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/goodarticles.info\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5233\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5234,"href":"https:\/\/goodarticles.info\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5233\/revisions\/5234"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goodarticles.info\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/1904"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/goodarticles.info\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=5233"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goodarticles.info\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=5233"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goodarticles.info\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=5233"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}